Stressed (book)

Stressed is the 3rd story written by Colby James and focuses on Bessie Higgenbottom who in need wants help from a nice bunny scout named Donald 'Don' MacDonald,

Story

• One day,
• Mrs. Gibbons: And that is how you give people manicures...or pedicures...or whatever.
• Roxxy: I'm learning so much right now!
• Nisa: Uh, yeah.
• Mrs. Gibbons: So, it looks to be about that time. Now before you all leave, if there is anyone, and by anyone I of course mean Bessie, who would like to make an announcement, now's a better time than any.
• Kappus: OOH OOH! OOOH! OOOOOH! HEY! OVERHERE! ME! PICK ME! OOH! OOOOOOOOOH! PICK ME! ME! ME! ME! ME! ME! ME! ME!
• Mrs. Gibbons: ALRIGHT! The weird old guy has an announcement, I guess.
• Kappus: Hello party peeps, I would like to introduce a new badge on your badge-collectin' quests. The Boyfriend Badge!!
• Kappus pretending to be an angelic choir.
• Kappus: The goal of this badge is to find that special someone!
• Nisa: Hey genius, were 10-year-olds, well most of us. How do you expect us to-
• Kappus: THE BADGE! ISN'T IT GREAT!
• Bessie: Can he do that?
• Mrs. Gibbons shrugs
• Bessie: Well alright, time to turn on badge mode!
• Bessie starts going badge-crazy as usual.
• Matilda: Yeah, I'm still here.
• Later at lunch,
• Bessie sits at a table with Penny, Roxxy, Nisa and of course, Happy.
• Bessie: AAH! WHAT AM I GONNA DO, GUYS! IF I GET THE BADGE, I'LL BE STUCK WITH SOME GROSS BOY! BUT IF I DON'T GET THE BADGE, I WON'T BECOME THE MIGHTY B! I'M SO DOOMED! DOOOOOOOM-ED!!!!!1!!!
• Roxxy: Well, there's always Kappus.
• Bessie: EEEEEWW! NO!
• Roxxy: JK LOL!
• Nisa: Ugh, you've been talking in text-language all morning. Give it a rest, already.
• Roxxy: Oh yeah! Well, L-M-F-A-O!
• Nisa: -__-
• Happy: Bark.
• Bessie: No, Happy. The bees've already seen you in your high school jock costume. They'll never fall for that.
• Penny: Ya know, Bessie. In times like these, I always bring up the good ol' bucket of glue.
• Bessie: Penny, you're the only person who can actually digest glue. I think I'm just gonna have to suck it up and find a boyffffrerefrfrferffeerfeerferferfeerfrfeffrerrrff- (Sigh) even if it kills me.
• Kappus and Millie notice Bessie's problem...
• Kappus: Boy, who knew a 9-year-old would have trouble understanding and finding someone to have ROMANTIC relations with.
• Portia: (overhearing) Uh yeah, YA THINK!
• Kappus: GET BACK TO THE CORNER, WITCH!
• Portia murmurs to herself and walks off.
• The next day,
• Bessie: OK, I can do this. Finding a boyfriend shouldn't be hard, right? Right! I got this one in the bag.
• It's revealed that Bessie was talking to herself in the mirror.
• Bessie: Wow, I need to get out more.
• Don shows up.
• Bessie: Uh, not him. Kappus says it needs to be genuine.
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Maybe Happy has some other costumes.
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Let's see if Rocky's single.
• Rocky: Actually, Portia might think I'm dating you to make her jealous, so no. Sorry, B.
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Maybe nobody knows that Ben and I are related.
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Uuuh, H-hey Finger, wanna play dress-up?
• Finger shakes his head no.
• Bessie: C'mon, man! I need that-
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Lesbian! Of course, I should just be a Lesbian!
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: No!
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: How are you even doing this?
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: This is getting really redundant.
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Stop that!
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: SHITPICKLE!
• Don shows up again.
• Bessie: Fine! I'm desperate, anyway.
• Don: YAY! Let's go to your house, I'm sure your family will be thrilled.
• Bessie: Knowing Mom, she'll be ecstatic about anything.
• At the house
• Hilary: (Squees) OOOH, MY LITTLE GIRL SNAGGED ONE! I'M SO PROUD!
• Bessie: Uh, yeah. This is Don.
• Don: The pleasure's mine.
• Hilary: Good for you, sweety. I can't wait to tell the girls.
• Bessie: Please don't tell anybody.
• Hilary: What was that, I'm sending a really LOUD tweet.
• Hilary sends the tweet.
• Bessie -__-
• Happy: Bark.
• Bessie: Oh, hey Happy. This is Don.
• Bessie: (whispers to Happy) the guy I'm dating TEMPORARILY to get a badge.
• Happy: Bark.
• Happy sniffs Don to see if he's a nice guy.
• Happy: Bark.
• Bessie: Are ya sure?
• Happy double-checks
• Happy gives a thumbs-up.
• Bessie: OK, thanks Happy. Just don't tell anybody about this.
• Happy: Bark.
• Happy sends the tweet.
• Bessie: >__<
• Don: Hey Bessie, what's the K in your name stand for-
• Bessie: Well, I guess you'll be off then.
• Don: Wait Bessie, so when you become the Mighty B! How about seeing as how we're dating, I be your sidekick.
• Bessie: Well, about tha-
• Ben: Hey!
• Ben: Who's this?
• Bessie: Oh, hey Ben. This is Don.
• Ben checks Don out.
• Ben: So, you got a new sidekick, huh?
• Bessie: Wha?
• Ben: I HEARD IT ALL, BESSIE! I can take a hint.
• Ben walks off depressed.
• Bessie: He'll get over it.
• Ben starts making loud noises.
• Bessie: What a crybaby.
• Don: So, Bessie. Would you like to go out on a date?
• Bessie: Yes, of course.
• Bessie: (whispers to Happy) So now, I can get the badge!
• Bessie: Ya know what, let's invite Mrs. Gibbons over.
• Don: That sounds nice. She probably doesn't have anything to do, anyway.
• The next day, Bessie is rewarded the badge.
• Bessie: AWTHUM!
• Bessie walks off but sees Don.
• Don: Well Bessie, you got the badge. Now it's time for-
• Bessie: Hold that thought for a second, guy.
• Bessie goes over to her friends at the playground to show them the badge.
• Don looks at Bessie like an angel.
• Don: Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday.
• Kappus joins in on the fun.
• Kappus: YAAAY! CONGLAGURATION, BESSIE!
• Kappus gets stuck in the tire-swing and the others have a good hardy laugh.
• Kappus: Heh, heh. Uh, help.
• The End

Characters

• Bessie Kojlica Higgenbottom
• Happy Walter Higgenbottom
• Donald Jay Jay French MacDonald
• Benjamin Higgenbottom
• Penny Wabigal Lefcowitz
• Roxxy
• Nisa Ganish Reddy
• Rocky Rhodes
• Mary Francis Gibbons
• Kappus Michael Dee Snider Lovell Dario
• Hilary Higgenbottom
• Portia Hayes Gibbons (cameo)
• Matilda (cameo)

Trivia

• In the story how to get a girlfriend and boyfriend you have to be it's friend first otherwise it is called Stalking someone and will creep people out, just try hide your feelings to girls and wait and see oneday and tell them how you feel but give them space at times is the key,
• The resins why Kappus introduced the Boyfriend Badge is clearly unknown, thought it is possible he introduced it to get a girl like Millie whom like her where hiding their feelings to see what it was like,
• This is the third story after 'A Brand new Job for Kappus' which follows the advents after that story like all the books do,